Just a part of a partly unexpected party
by TigressPL
Summary: If you read and liked tearthgrrl's stories about the hyena trio, you might also like this parody. Warning! May make no sense without proper knowledge of tearthgrrl's works!


Well, here it is, a second installment of tearthgrrl's world's parody! Several author's notes to start with:

The story is based upon characters and events depicted in tearthgrrl's stories, most of the characters not being intellectual propriety of Disney are her OCs.

**The story is referring to events from several tearthgrrl's stories about the hyenas – their knowledge might be critical to understand some puns or cracks. Also, there may be spoilers of those events. Therefore, it is highly recommended that you read through her works first – and believe me, it's worth it! ;) **(if afterwards the references will soon be unclear, I will gladly answer any message with questions)

**To visit tearthgrrl's profile, copy this url, deleting spaces: http:// www. fanfiction. net/ ~tearthgrrl**

The quote near the end is taken from J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit".

And I warn you – the story is **highly** random.

That's all. If, after reading the bold part carefully, you're willing to proceed, I'm not stopping you ;)

* * *

It was a hot and arid… well, a **normal **day at the Elephant Graveyard, as Ed and Banzai were laying inside Banzai's den. A huge torn poster on the floor indicated there's going to be some grand party in the graveyard that night. Ed was looking out through the entrance, until suddenly he started talking in his own language… Only to be cut short by Banzai.

"Bone", he mumbled, utterly bored. "Shenzi's right, we otta find a new game."

Ed looked at him curiously, clearly caught by the idea, but Banzai just shrugged.

"I dunno… how 'bout associations?" as the look of waiting remained on Ed's muzzle, he understood the necessity of explaining the big, fancy word. "It's a word for… How did that wacky monkey put it? For somethin' you think about when ya think about somethin' else." Ed didn't move a bit, so he continued. "For example, when I say »day« ya think about sun, and when I say »night« you see moon. That's what an association is."

Ed finally got a look of comprehension on his muzzle and nodded forcefully, expressing his approval for the idea.

"Ok, I'll start," Banzai said. "Whaddya think 'bout when I say… Pridelands?"

"Gnawh," his reply came almost immediately, apparently Ed didn't have to give it much thought.

"Food? Good enough… It's your turn, then."

In response, Ed produced a series of cackles in a questionably questioning tone. Banzai, however, didn't seem to care.

"Zebra, huh? Let me see… Shenzi, I think. It's her favorite one, after all. For you: walking."

"Gnawh."

"Food again? Well, when we walk it's usually to find somethin' to eat, so I get your point."

Several inarticulate sounds indicated that Ed came up with another proposition.

"A tusk…" Banzai appeared to be in thought for a while. Suddenly, though, his eyes sparkled. "Shenzi, definitely. It was a tusk that caused us to… um, never mind. Let's try… fun?"

"Gnawh." Banzai grunted.

"Don't you have any other hobbies…? Anyway, answer was good, so what's your question?" This time, Ed refrained to a single sound. "What do I associate with night…? Shenzi," seeing Ed's inquisitive glance, he felt obliged to add, "and no, I'm not gonna explain it to ya. By the way whaddaya say for Shenzi?"

Ed was specific, as usually. "Gnawh. Gnawh?"

"…Shenzi. Gah, we're hopeless!" he exclaimed, in reaction to which Ed said something in a consoling tone. He didn't move from his place, however.

"I didn't mean… me'n'her…" Banzai started to defend, but he quickly gave up. "It's that obvious?"

Ed nodded, bursting into laughter at the sight of his friend's expression.

"Well, smartface, let me see you proposing something to change the way this situation looks…"

***

"»Let me take you to Upendi«," Banzai read from a small book, entitled »How to ask a girl out – guide for newbies«. "Gee, that place is second most visited tourist attraction after Priderock. How would any place that crowded be romantic? Let's see the next one… »Can you feel the love tonight?«" He sighed. "I guess the only line less original would be," he stroke a theatrical pose and turned towards the entrance… just as T came in. "Hi, I love you."

T was rendered speechless for a while, after which she succeeded in uttering a simple "Um…"

Embarrassed, Banzai rubbed the back of his neck and started to explain: "I was just… uh… rehearsing," as he was talking, T marked something in her notebook. "Yeah, that's it, rehearsing! For a-"

"Whaddaya mean, love me?!" she suddenly cut in, scolding him. "Some kinda stupid game'a'yours? Perhaps I should have that idea beaten outta your empty head…"

"Woah, slow down…!" Banzai took a moment to compose himself before he said, "You sounded completely like Shenzi, y'know."

"Well, since you're already rehearsing with **such** lines," T pointed, "I thought you'd like to know her reaction in advance."

"Wait, I didn't mean…" he started, rubbing the back of his neck. "It's **really **that obvious?" T marked something in her notebook again. "And what're you writing?"

"Oh, I'm just counting the times males rub the back of their necks for Gituku," she said nonchalantly, then suddenly got pale. "Oops."

"Gituku?" Banzai looked as if he were about to throw a fit of rage. "I'm gonna kill that bastard!" he screamed, dashing out of the den.

"Guess I can go tell Shenzi there's gonna be a bloodshed in the neighborhood," T muttered.

***

After a short run, Banzai stopped right in front of Gituku's den.

"Gituku!!" he yelled. "Come on out!"

"What is it, birdie brain?" came a voice from inside, as the host went out. "You want someone to launch **you** from the Birdie Boiler?"

"Tsk, tsk, such smart, such evasive. Just stand and fight!" Banzai said, getting into pouncing position.

"Why would I?" Gituku shrugged. "I'm in a middle of a romantic evening meeting with Monifa…"

"But it's the middle of the day," Banzai stated matter-of-factly.

"My, doesn't the time flow fast when you're with a woman you love?" his mocking answer came.

"What's that supposed to mean…?" It took him a moment, but when he got his adversary's point, he screamed even louder, "Argh, enough'a this! Stop talking and start fightin'!

"Nah, thanks. It's much funnier to make you look dumber than Ed."

"You just fear to accept my challenge 'cause you know you'd lose!"

"Perhaps," he shrugged. "But if ya insist on using brute ways to solve this dispute…"

"I do," Banzai stated, readying to attack.

"Then I shall leave you to talk with Tiny."

"Wait… who's Tiny?" he asked, surprised.

"Oh, just a lion I adopted," Gituku answered, as though it were completely normal for a hyena.

"And here I thought you got no sense'a humor… But this time you must be _kitting_!", Banzai laughed.

"Not really," Gituku replied. As he reentered his den, a large shadow emerged from within. Banzai had to seriously bend his neck backwards to look into Tiny's angry eyes.

"Oh shit."

***

Shenzi was strolling briskly through her beloved, beautiful homeland. Well, okay, the b-words were inaccurate. Let us respell it: Shenzi was strolling idly between high piles of indigestible things, namely bones, rocks and dirt, of which her loathed, filthy homeland consisted. She had no real purpose in her walk, as whole clan was busy with preparations to the party, everybody knew what to do and there was apparently no need to advise or command anyone.

"Man, is this place boring at times…" she muttered, thinking not only of the total emptiness of her surroundings, but also of the party she knew she will have to watch over, finding no fun in it whatsoever.

She was about to think of another boring feature of the graveyard, when she noticed Banzai, who tried to walk with a normal speed despite the pain it evidently caused.

"But it could always have been worse," she said to herself, finishing her previous said-aloud thought. "I could have been born Banzai. Hey, meathead!" she called to him.

"Oh, hey, Shenzi!" Banzai's head immediately perked up, as did, apparently, his spirits. "Listen, I was just… I wanted to talk to ya 'bout somethin'."

"I hope it's not about your _tiny_ problem with Gituku."

"So you know? How d'you think, how'd he did that?" Banzai asked confidentially.

Shenzi looked at him strangely before replying, "You two idiots are trying to break each other's head three times a week. Plus, I don't hafta read newspapers ta know when you've been beaten. And I doubt anything new was to be seen, from what I recall your fights are all alike."

"I meant **the lion**."

"What lion? Are ya sure Gituku didn't crack ya skull?" she asked, without a hint of compassion.

He looked at her for a moment as if to check if she's not joking. "Never mind," he sighed, making a clear observation, "you wouldn't believe me anyway."

"As ya wish," Shenzi shrugged. "Oh, hi Ed."

"ED?! Whatcha doin' here?" Banzai asked suspiciously. After hearing Ed's response, he narrowed his eyes, screaming: "Should be fun!? Why, you…"

"Oh, right, you wanted to tell me somethin', didn't ya?" Shenzi remembered.

"Forget it, it's no more importa-" he tried to evade, but Shenzi insisted… And he never had much resistance against her will. "Y'know, after all we've been through together… I mean, we were transformed into lions, meerkats, hell, even humans-!"

"Get to the point," she cut in, as if already regretting she asked him to speak up.

"We narrowly avoided death several times…" Banzai continued, then to his own amazement managed to conclude: "It should bring us closer… And we've not yet been on a single date…" deciding to use his momentum to its full extent, he shot: "Maybe you'd agree to come with me to the party today?"

There was a long pause as Shenzi looked at Banzai with unclear expression, Banzai seemingly turned from a hyena into pure essence of anticipation and apprehension, and Ed watched them both, already having good fun, but waiting for even more entertainment. Sadly for him, Shenzi restrained to answering in a cold, threatening voice:

"I'll pretend I never heard it… Only because you're probably too fragile to touch after the last time Gituku beat ya."

"He had a darn lion!" he defended automatically, making her look at him with a mixture of pity and resentment. This setting finally gave Ed reason to laugh uncontrollably. Not that he needed much of a reason.

"Hey, did I ask for your advice?!" Banzai screamed furiously and Ed couldn't help nodding, becoming a soon-to-be victim of his impulsive companion. The vengeance was pushed away, however, as the second-in-command heard Shenzi addressing him directly.

"Seriously, you should write some kinda Ed-English online dictionary, Banzai," she said. "I'm'a kinda tired of your constant, impossible to understand conversations."

Banzai cast a last angry glare at Ed before asking, "And how'd ya use it?"

"Via the Net, of course." The answer seemed to have achieved only as much as confusing Banzai, so she decided it'd be necessary to explain: "The Internet. T showed me how to use it. Think of it as an opposite of Ed: all-knowing, fast-thinkin'-"

"I know what the Net is!" he broke into her flow of speech. "But how on earth wouldja connect to it in the Elephant Graveyard?"

"Scar's got unsecured router and signal strong enough to reach us. I wonder what does he use it for though…"

***

Meanwhile, in his den, Scar was laying in front of a laptop.

"…pho…tos…of…Sa…ra…fi…" he was mumbling the letters, trying his best to click only one key at the time, when suddenly…

"Hi Scar!" Sarafina greeted him cheerfully, appearing in the entrance. "Happy to see me?" She noticed the laptop and asked curiously: "Oh, what you're doing?" As she tried to look at laptop's screen though, Scar quickly closed it and shoved it away. A moment of awkward silence passed. "You weren't…" Scar clenched his eyes, expecting a lecture, "…looking for hitmen to hire again?"

Relieved, he replied: "No, no, why would I? The last time I tried really taught me something… Plus, I wasn't myself, as you probably remember. If you don't mind, can I ask you what is the purpose of your unexpected visit?"

"I- Would you like to go for a date with me today?"

The silence that followed these words was so deep one could hear hyenas' laughter from the Elephant Graveyard.

"To avoid mentioning several even more uncomfortable matters," Scar finally asked, "shouldn't it be a male to ask such question?"

"Right, I'm just gonna lay around, waiting for one of them to ask me. Let's see… Simba is married, you are rarely seen outside your den... as for the other males… there are none!"

"Wait, so…" Scar appeared to be in thought for a while. "Where do all the cubs come from…?

"Oh, it's a royal duty," she said lightly, then looked at him suspiciously. "I thought you too…"

"No, I've never…"

"Oh, so you're a…"

"A lovely bunch of coconuts, yes," he finally finished a sentence. As Sarafina burst with laughter, he asked, "Tell me, how do you feel about hyenas?"

"I hear they are behaving themselves since the time you'd hired them, so I have no certain reason to dislike them. Why?"

"They're going to have some kind of feast… I mean, a party. I wasn't originally planning to go, but as you proposed…"

"Great! When do we meet?"

***

After a long and boring stroll through the inhospitable region, Scar got to Banzai's den. Entering, he noticed Banzai and Ed laying about, both looking as if they tried their hardest to think about anything… but failed anyway.

"Mornin', gentlemen," he said plainly, laying down in a place relatively free from thrash.

"Oh, hey Scar," Banzai perked up. "I'd ask ya what's up, but seein' as you're not in the mood I must ask: What's down?"

"I've just asked Sarafina to come with me for today's party," Scar sighed.

"So you're comin', great! Wait… THIS is a reason to be down in the dumps? I still can't make Shenzi even look kindly at me, save alone agreeing to go with me..."

Unexpectedly, Ed cut into his sentence, asking a question to Scar.

"Who's Nala?" Banzai asked in confusion.

"Yes, her mother," Scar confirmed Ed's question. He didn't have to ask another, as Scar continued, "Therefore I understand your astonishment at her complete forgiveness of my past mistakes… I told her I was possessed by devil then."

"But it was Zira that carried Shetani within herself, not you," Banzai cackled, finally understanding what that was about.

"It's **Vitani**, I've told you already," Scar spat.

Next Ed's question was answered by Banzai, "No, I toldya already, the party can't be hosted nowhere else than Elephant Graveyard."

"Well, after what you've done for me during Simba's youth…" Scar confirmed, "I wouldn't count for that."

A long moment of sad silence followed.

"Exactly…" Banzai asked, "why didja hire **us** to kill SImba in the first place? Why not the cheetahs, for example? 'Cause y'know, it really destroyed any chances we'd had to be let inta Pridelands…"

"Why, I'd found your advertisement in local press, it said you're the best ones available… Here," the lion said, handing his ex-worker a piece of paper.

"»Hyena hitmen looking for a job. We're BEST!«," he read, then screamed angrily, "ED!"

Called by his friend, he looked up from the stone he was probably going to chew on before interruption.

Banzai showed him the piece of newspaper, saying: "When you're putting someone's initials into a job offer, you should put a dot at the end of it. Like this," he took a pen and put four dots in proper places. "See? »B.E.S.T«."

As Scar looked at them with disbelief, Ed answered in his own language of grunts and laughs, sounding quite sure of himself.

"A pun?" Banzai scolded. "I'll give you a pun-ch, idiot! You think the lions would know our names to get it? Don't ya remember that lions, in general, are pushy, stinky, hairy, **stupid**…? Uh, no offense, Scar."

"After all that time in the company of Ed and the dumbest hyena ever it takes more than that to offend me," the lion stated, examining his claws.

"Sure, whatever you say… Scarface," Banzai taunted, to which Scar protested with a short »Hey!«. "Anyway, Ed, it's good you have already broken with Abeni back then, otherwise you woulda written that »we're BEAST«. I wonder what events would that trigger…?"

Ed shrugged, then said something and went out of the den. Unbeknownst to the other two, outside he met Abeni, hugged her and they both went away.

***

Entering the trio's (or actually, the quartet's) skull, T spotted Shenzi laying in a corner, reading something. To her inexpressible amazement, she noticed the clan's matriarch was… crying. Being the compassionate type she was, T approached her silently and patted her on the back, asking kindly: "What's the matter, Shenzi? I've never seen you- Is it my diary?"

"It's so beautiful," Shenzi whispered, wiping her tears discretely, "your love with Nakaki. I think it's better than Romeo and Juliet."

T was rendered speechless. The reaction couldn't match that of Banzai or Ed if they heard something like that, but even with her amount of experience with the clan's matriarch, she knew she was witnessing a confession as possible as seeing the king of Pridelands serving drinks for hyenas in the centre of the graveyard.

"So…" she managed to say after a long struggle with her stunned throat, "all those romance books I found one day were yours? I thought Ed used them as manuals."

"The guy could not read a word if his life depended on it, T. Still, I really envy both him and you, what with whole your popularity…"

"What popularity?" T asked, surprised.

"Don't say me you don't know every hyena -- well, every male at least -- finds you… attractive. I wonder why our lil' Casanova hasn't tried to seduce ya yet."

"That's… new," T said, astonished evenly upon hearing such things… and upon hearing them from **Shenzi**.

"Eh, I envy you this so much. The only male to ever find me interesting enough to at least talk to was Ed, and he broke our relationship almost immediately. What do I lack? I'm said we look almost exactly alike, so it has to be my character that makes me so… unwanted. Or is it my position?"

"Er, Shenzi…" T cut in, "are you-? Let me ask otherwise, how many of my eyes are closed?"

"Both," Shenzi answered dryly, looking at her friend in bafflement. "Why?"

"I had to check something. So… you want to find a guy who likes you?" Shenzi nodded, still looking suspiciously after last weird question. "Let's try this: I'll be acting as some random guy talking to you and you'll reply in the same way you would reply if it were real. Got it?" She confirmed, though she wasn't looking as though she were convinced. "Hi, Shenzi, what's up?"

"Not ya business," Shenzi answered without hesitation.

"That's gonna be hard," T muttered to herself, then decided to try something Ed told her Banzai asked Shenzi earlier that day. " Maybe you'd agree to come with me to the party today?"

"I'd love to," Shenzi smiled, "but it ain't possible that anyone will speak that ta me."

"That's **really** gonna be hard."

***

_Back in Banzai's den…_

"What should I tell her?" Scar asked, nervous about the upcoming party.

"Don't ask me," Banzai answered, "**any** text I tried on Shenzi, as well as all my efforts were in vain."

"Sucks to be you."

"Scar, are ya feelin' well?" Banzai asked with a hint of joke in his tone. "I think I understood everything you said, for about the first time."

"No, I'm not feeling well. I guess I should return to the Priderock and try to get some rest."

With that, he left, leaving Banzai alone. The word stung painfully as he thought of it.

_Figures I can check if Net's really available around here,_ he thought after a while and proceeded to turn his laptop on. He managed to establish a connection through Scar's router, indeed. His spirit lightly raised, Banzai opened an Internet browser. A quite empty page appeared, with a big colorful writing over an input field and two buttons.

"»Go ogle«," he read aloud. "Why, I'd love to. What, should I type a name here?" With a focus in the search field, he wrote »Shenzi«. After a quick thought, he looked around - just in case - and added »Marie Predatora Veldetta Jacquelina Hyena«, then quickly tapped »Search«.

The results were quite disappointing, if anything. Almost no photos, mostly text links. What to ogle at? With a sigh, he opened one of the links at random. Only because he had nothing better to do, he started to read the text. Something about Shenzi talking to several other hyenas, then-

"Hey! They've mentioned me?" he thought aloud, looking with confusion at description of himself running through the graveyard, then tripping upon something. He suddenly gritted his teeth, as he came to understand: "That's those two morons from the other clan! Man, they've written about it on the Net? I'm gonna kill them!… or worse. Let me just trace 'em…"he scrolled the page up, only to find the authors nickname didn't match the names of the two pranksters at all. "»T-earth-grrl«," he read, stuttering. "What's this, some kinda T's diary? What the hell's going on here, she's writing the chronicles of Elephant Graveyard? With all the embarrassing moments included?"

He fought about it for a second, then decided to find out something more about this »Tearthgrrl«. He went back to the homepage, and, as the instruction above the field read, "went to ogle »Tearthgrrl«". Looking through the results, he found her several positive judgments about the three of them, some stories about T, her age ("That can't be T, then," he muttered) and an article entitled »Shenzi, Banzai, Ed or T?«. Intrigued, he opened the link and began reading. For several minutes he had difficulty reading on, almost suffocating from laughter while reading the others' answers to several questions.

Only after settling down did he remember those were real questions, asked to them quite some time ago by that weirdish hyena, few years older than them, that seemed to watch almost everything they were doing throughout their lives. What was her name again? Tiff? _Well_, he decided, _at least she's a hyena. I don't think I want to know what would happen if our lives' story's been written by some lioness, or, I dunno, tigress._

He sat idly for a while, seemingly thinking about something, then decided it couldn't hurt to check what -- in the opinion of the aforementioned hyena -- was Shenzi thinking about him.

***

As Banzai was playing an amateur detective, Scar was nearing Priderock, intending to use the hours left to the date with Sarafina to sleep and calm down a bit. The plans changed, however, as he heard loud series of laughter erupting from the main den. Slightly interested as to what could make his beloved niece so happy, he went towards the source of cachinnations.

"Man, I hate outsiders," came Simba's voice."

"Really?" Nala's voice answered. "If it weren't for those hyenas, we'd rulling the whole kingdom."

"Man, I hate hyenas," came Simba's reply.

"So sneaky," Nala teased.

"So stinky," Simba joined her.

"And, man, are they…" Nala started, then they finished in unison: "Stupid!"

That was the moment Scar chose to appear at the entrance. Clearing his throat, he opposed: "I can assure you hyenas aren't really that bad when you come to know them."

The royal couple, startled upon hearing his voice, quickly regained their composure.

"Oh, Scar. It's just you," Simba »greeted« him.

"We were afraid it was somebody important," Nala added.

"I think I've heard something like that once," Scar muttered.

"Like who?" Simba asked, perplexed upon hearing Nala's comment. "Who's more important than us around?"

"I don't know… but there are some animals with comparable power, look for example at the leader of the hyenas' clan… Shenzi Marie Predatora Veldetta Jacquelina Hyena."

Simba laughed a bit, his mane shaking. "I just hear that name and I shudder," he admitted. "Do it again," he asked, nudgind his mate playfully.

"Shenzi Marie Predatora Veldetta Jacquelina Hyena," Nala said again, trying not to stutter upon reciting the lenghty name. This time the king of Pridelands barely kept his footing, laughing hard. Nala jumped at the occasion and tried to repeat it one more time, but failed. In the middle of declaiming she too started to cackle intensely, losing her ability to talk.

"Talk about déjà vu," Scar muttered to himself, returning to his den.

"It tingles me!" he heard Simba's voice, muffled because of his intense laughter, as he was leaving. If he stayed there, they would surely start to quarrel with him, leading him to- But he knew better than to sing songs of dethronement now.

***

_Back in Banzai's den…_

The clan's second-in-command was about to get to the favorite point of his life, the accidental kiss with Shenzi. "_Without warning_," he read, "_Ed felt himself trip and land face first on a pile of bones. Then go sliding down straight towards his two friends. Just before he smack landed on the rocky ground though, he crashed into-_"

He was suddenly forced to stop, as a paw gently stepped at the laptop's screen, causing it to close. Banzai looked up to see who is the impudent trespasser asking to be torn into shreds… only to stop upon acknowledging, with a huge dose of astonishment, it was Shenzi who interrupted him. Nonetheless, it was nothing compared to the shock he underwent when she said:

"I'd love to go with you to the tonight's party, Banzai."

Now, to say he was unable to speak wouldn't be a big understatement. It would be absolutely **huge**. He has heard weird things in his life, but hearing such words from Shenzi was as possible as… well, it was not. That's probably why his only reaction to her statement was a prolonged gaze combined with a jaw-drop. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he forced his voice chords into action – only to say, not very loud:

"That's… great."

A long moment passed until Banzai decided to speak again, taking his chance and asking:

"What's made ya change your mind… If you don't, um, mind asking?"

"I had a… rather long talk with T," Shenzi admitted, as images of training more exhausting then the ones her mother organized flashed through her memory. T done what seemed impossible and actually made the clan's matriarch acknowledge her best friend's feelings towards her, but it required **much **effort.

"So, I guess we'll be seein' each othah in two hours?" Shenzi asked with a faint smile, walking out.

Banzai didn't bother to answer. He knew such exertion could destroy his shattered mind, so, to even out the unbearable level of head usage, he started to gnaw on a left-over bone from a previous day. He definitely needed some time to get used to the new world he's suddenly appeared in.

***

_Two hours later…_

A massive crowd gathered in the largest clearing of the graveyard, celebrating, as a gigantic banner stated, the end of a month. The writing, however, was crossed out. Huge letters above read: "Get-together of of Shenzi and Banzai", and next to it was another writing, approximately twice as large: "Finally."

The congregation, though consisting mostly of hyenas, also hosted several other guests, as Scar, Sarafina and a few other lionesses, clearly present only because of their friend's absence in the Priderock. A vigilant eye would also be able to pick out a monkey – baboon, probably – walking among all the carnivores without fear. Some would have then pointed the long stick he was carrying as the reason of his fearlessness, but a much more convincible theory was that all the hyenas were too confused by the primate's reckless behavior to attack him. After all, someone that sure of himself, when surrounded by natural enemies, must have had some pact with the matriarch guaranteeing their safety. Of course, no one bothered to ask the leader about a possible deal.

All the other animals present at the party were… unable to move, breathe or perform any other action characteristic for living beings. For a solid reason.

The whole place was flooded by loud rap music, emitted from huge amplifiers. Shenzi was, after all, keeping an iron grasp over the clan and she would not have anything else played at a major festivity.

From her elevated position, Shenzi saw everything happening on the party grounds. There was Ed, dancing with Abeni, much to Banzai's confusion; Scar, talking somewhat… defensively with Sarafina; Gituku sneaking off with a piece of meat enough for a grown lion… _Nah,_ she thought, _I'm not gonna believe that stupid excuse of Banzai's. Gituku's just not really social, plus he's probably carrying a portion for Monifa, and who knows for whom else. _She couldn't also help but notice several pairs of watchful eyes focused on T, who was dancing alone near the edge of the crowd. Which reminded her of T's lessons, in explicit not to ignore her… partner. Temporary, of course.

"Don't you find it annoying," she asked, as she could think of nothing better, "that there's a separate word for lionesses and there's none for female hyenas?"

He must have been focusing on her whole the time (reasons for which could be guessed by anyone at least as smart as Ed), because her answer came almost immediately.

"I dunno… wouldja like to be called »hyeness«?"

"Why not?" Shenzi smirked. "It sounds quite similar to »highness«… Your Highness Hyeness," she tried the sound of the newly forged title. "On the othah paw… if every female hyena would be called that, the word would be stripped of all dignity."

Banzai answered, but she missed the point as a large group of hyenas -- other than that she invited – appeared inside the borders of Elephant Graveyard. She quickly calmed down, however, recognizing the clan that's "invaded" their lands several weeks ago.

The visitors didn't go unnoticed among the host clan, either. The only reactions worth noting, however, were those of several pairs of watchful eyes closing in defeat as T was approached by Nakaki… and of Abeni, coming away from Ed with a scoff after he hugged with Marini. "That's what you call a date?" her expression seemed to say. Ed didn't look as if he cared though.

"Maybe there's some topic you'd like to discuss, Banzai?" Shenzi asked to keep conversation up.

"Sure, uh… I'll just be back in a while," he mumbled and raced off, joining the mass of hyenas beneath.

Only to stop near T and her lover.

"Say, uh, Nakaki… could I talk to ya for a moment? I know you don't have much time together, but… I'd be really grateful for several advices."

"Why would I be the right hyena to ask?" the other alpha male asked, surprised.

"Uh… From what I've read, you seem quite… knowledgeable in the topics of, uh, being together?" Banzai stuttered.

"Seems my diaries are commonly known," T rolled her eyes.

"Well," Nakaki shrugged, "I guess I could spare a moment."

***

Elsewhere in the crowd, Ed went towards Scar – both were deprived of their female companions.

"Alone too?" they asked themselves in unison -- though Ed's version could not hope to be written down with a typical set of letters.

"Sarafina decided that after all she doesn't like the feeling of being surrounded by several score of antagonistic predators," Scar proceeded to explain. "And since the other lionesses are practically her satellites… The situation looks as it does."

In response, Ed said that Marini likes variety, so she went to find yet another male to talk to. He complained about this being unfair in his opinion.

"Seeing what you've done to Abeni, I don't think you're privileged to say such things," Scar pointed, making Ed lose his attitude.

After a while, Ed told the lion about his recent conversation with some wise old hyena, who introduced himself cryptically as "Serpent's Code". According to his words, he continued, hyenas weren't at all canine, oppositely to what Scar suggested in their recent discussion. Hyenas were, he said, feline, with their closest cousins being meerkats. At this, the bigger predator erupted with laughter.

"Talk about cannibalism, eh?" he laughed. "What was that guy's name again? I'd like to talk to him, the number of truly hilarious hyenas decreases."

Through a series of resentful sounds, Ed expressed his pain about Scar's unbelief, which made him say:

"Of course I don't say he couldn't have been right. Luckily, I've taken my laptop, I'll just check it in the Internet. Though," he muttered, looking at the screen, "there's not much connections available, only my router. I guess I'll have to put a password onto it, too many occasion-catchers could use it here."

Ed grunted. He just **knew** it wass going to be blamed upon him.

"Would you look at that!" Scar exclaimed after a while. "The old one was right, you really **are** feline and closely related to meerkats… Say," he teased, "how many of your cousins have you eaten, Ed?"

In an angry voice, Ed answered that he at least never tried to kill his niece.

"Figures," Scar replied, "trying to kill mine was enough for you."

***

As Nakaki went away with Banzai, Marini neared T. They knew themselves for quite some time before, so Marini decided the time was right to reunite. After a short introduction, several remarks about local weather and males worth to look at, she decided to start some more interesting topic.

"Maybe it's just me being inexperienced and all, but hosting such parties isn't a habit for hyena clans, according to my knowledge. How did such an idea come to live?" she asked.

"I'll tell you, but not before you tell me how did you know about the party… and got here in time, seeing as the decision was made two days ago."

"Easy," Marini shrugged, "all it took was an SMS from Ed and a train ticket."

"Ed can write?" T asked in astonishment.

"Faultlessly," Marini confirmed. "But I've answered your question, so it's time to return the favor!"

"As you wish," T agreed.

_Flashback…_

The trio and T were lying idly in their common skull, simply enjoying each other's company. T, despite having spent some time with them, still wasn't acknowledged with all their ways -- this, for example, was hard to understand for her. She guessed right that she knew them just too short to be an integral part of the team.

"Man, I'm hungry," Banzai broke the silence, bringing on a topic far more familiar to the young hyena.

Ed extended a claw and with a horrendous sound made a straight, vertical cut on a skull wall next to him; there were already tons of such cuts, both vertical and horizontal. As he explained to T once, he was counting times Banzai mentioned his hunger and Shenzi to check what was more important for him. After a week he was slowly running out of place to make his calculations.

"Then go an' hunt somethin' down," Shenzi replied irritably. "Just so ya know though: it's patrol time fah the darned king and he ain't too keen on tresspassers."

"The law is stupid," Banzai spat. "The lions have more n' they can eat and they can't spare us a few pieces of game."

"And whatcha gonna do about it? Even the queen's favorite hyena," Shenzi waved her paw at T, "couldn't make them royals change it. What can we do?"

Ed perked his ears up and asked what does the law specifically state.

"That we ain't allowed ta hunt in the Pridelands unless consented by a member of royal family, excluding Scar," Shenzi explained.

"Well then," Banzai proposed, "why not make the herds come ta us?"

"I don't know if you've noticed, airhead, but we ain't chasin' them away. Somehow," she added sarcastically, "they decide to steer clear of the graveyard."

"Let's change it!" Banzai persisted. "We could put a sign in the Pridelands that would say it's a shortcut to the waterhole."

"It's »read«, idiot – the sign would read. And even if there is animal stupid enough to fall for it, the idea won't pass -- setting such sign would also require royal consent, therefore if we put it, it'd be removed the following day and some repercussions would probably befall the graveyarders."

"I dunno then, let's make a campaign »Elephant Graveyard – the best place to lose unnecessary pounds!«"

Shenzi just gave him a look, not bothering to answer.

"Come on!" Banzai turned to T and Ed. "There's gotta be somethin' we could use!"

"Um… advertisements »You can contribute to the best feasts on the graveyard!« or »The Graveyard Feasts need YOU!«"? T proposed without conviction.

"Nope," Shenzi smiled, "but you gave me an idea. If we organize a party, the king will hafta allow some huntin'!"

"Great!" Banzai exclaimed. "When do we start?"

_Flashback ends…_

"Well, it definitely worked," Marini remarked, motioning to the heaps of meat.

The party went on for a long time, provoking many merry events, but, as a wise man once wrote: "_Now it is a strange thing, but things that are good to have and days that are good to spend are soon told about, and not much to listen to; while things that are uncomfortable, palpitating, and even gruesome, may make a good tale, and take a deal of telling anyway._" And seeing as there were no uncomfortable, palpitating or gruesome events to be depicted…

***

The party ended at a late evening hour. Everybody parted, most graveyarders taking in several guests. Shenzi was walking with Banzai towards his den, they were speaking quietly, their heads close, their expressions heavenly.

"We've got much to catch up on," Shenzi said, a smirk suddenly appearing at her muzzle, "but without you."

For a moment, he looked as though something really heavy hit him. Then, he noticed she wasn't looking in his direction. He followed her sight-

"Whatever," a hyena slightly older than them shrugged, "I don't really like describing your romance too often anyway."

With that, the duo of clan leaders entered Banzai's den, therefore cutting the story short.


End file.
